Dearest blog, I have neglected you so. Not for lack of material - there have been adventures aplenty over the past few weeks - but for want of time. (In addition to said adventures, I recently decided to hop back on the preprofessional treadmill and apply to law school, which for now entails studying LSAT books for a few hours daily.) I promise I will get around to the Saidaiji Naked Man Festival and Japan's largest bath house later this week. In the meantime, I'd like to share with you a reminiscence from last October:
Pudgy, Precocious 4th Grade Boy: Carter-sensei! Carter-sensei!! Have you seen Biohazard?! (Known in the USA as Resident Evil)
Carter: Yes I have. The movie about zombies, right?
PP4GB: Yeah!! (credulously) Are there zombies in America?
C: Nope. No zombies.
PP4GB: (disappointedly) Really?..... oh.....
C: Well, there was that one time....
PP4GB: What?! What?!
C: (feigns pent-up sadness).... No..... It's too sad....
PP4GB: Tell me! Say it!!
C: My sister.... she.... she was eaten by a zombie!
PP4GB: No way!!! But wait.... doesn't that mean that she's a zombie now?
C: (frowns, nods grimly) I'm afraid so.
PP4GB: (seriously) Anyone who gets bitten turns into a zombie. I'm glad we don't have zombies here in Japan.
C: I guess you're right.... wait. Just before I got on the plane to come here, she.... she.... BLAWRRRRR!!!! (cocks head to side, contorts face to lopsided grimace, advances towards PP4G in jerky, limping gait) BRAINS!!! I WANT BRAINS!!!!
PP4GB: AHHHHH!!!!! (flees up stairs, does a double take, faces C with hands folded together, index fingers in the shape of a pistol barrel) POW POW!!! POW POW POW!!!!
C advances towards PP4GB arms outstretched, receives imaginary bullet to the face, slumps against the stairwell wall. The chime rings and PP4G runs to class.
Well entertained sir. Well intertained indeed.
ReplyDelete